Not so funny jokes :p

Teacher : Whoever answers my next question, can go home.

A boy throws his bag out through the window.

Teacher: Who threw the bag ?

Boy : Me, I'm going home. :P :P :D

A baby mosquito had returned after his 1st flight...

Daddy Mosquito: So son how did it feel?

Baby Mosquito: WOW dad, it was wonderful.. Everyone was clapping for me!!

Dad : son why don't you study?

Son : but why dad? 

Dad : so you'll get good marks.

Son : then?

Dad : you'll get a good salary.

Son : then?

Dad : you can afford a big house , nice car a better life.

Son : then?

Dad : you will relax.

Son : What do you think I'm doing right now?

All Of Us Have :

1- Peeled the skin of a grape and eaten it
2-Tried to balance a switch between on and off
3-poured water into the cap of the bottle and drank it

True ?

It was Christmas & the judge was in a good mood as he asks the accused, “What are you charged with?”

“Doing my X’mas shopping early, sir,” replies the accused.

“Well, that’s not a crime. How early were you doing this shopping?”

“Before the store opened,” said the accused.

‎3 most difficult things to do in the world.
.
1. You cant count your hair.
.
2. You cant wash your eyes with soap.

3. You cant breathe when your tongue is out..

You actually did #3 and you looked like a dog

‎"Tip to reduce weight"

1st turn your head to the left
2nd turn your head to the right....repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat..
...proven and tested,